LOW FAT VANCOUVER

I’m back. Well the trip started great…….no TVs on my flight. I didn't have book or anything to read. I had to read Marsha’s chick magazines. (BTW Mloyd and Jason there was an article in MarieClair about self esteem).

Got up Friday morning and went out for brunch at the elbow room. I like that they are mean to everyone. That’s my third time there and they haven’t been mean to me. Most likely because my normal face isn’t the friendliest but I can’t help it. Then Duke took us on a tour of West Hastings to see the crack people. Well let’s just say they’re not shy about their drug addiction. I was actually terrified some one would break out of their trance and attack the big mother of a truck we were in. It was like being at African Lion Safari. Duke suggested that we go back at night when all the crack heads come out to play. I was really hoping he would forget and thank god he did. Daytime was more than enough for me, but thanks for the offer. Anyway after that I went to the aquarium. I had never been to an aquarium so I was psyched... no one els was but fuck 'em they all had to come. I liked the beluga whales. It didn’t go over well when I asked someone who worked there if that’s where beluga caviar came from. I was pretty much scolded and that if it was it's illegal in Canada. It was fun to freak out the fish lady so I was sure to ask someone else later on and pretty much got the same reaction....yaaaay!

We left the aquarium and went out for dinner and proceeded to get loaded. We started drinking at 5:00 and when everyone else went home at 12:00 I thought it would be a good idea to jump in a cab and continue drinking till 4:30. People still talked to me eventhough I was plastered not as many as usual tho. I can’t believe anyone would even want to talk to me when I was that drunk. But they did and took me to after-hours then to breakfast then back to where I was staying in Kitsilano. Not sure if they were worried I would end up dead, thinking someone will get lucky, or if they just really like drunk people. I choose to believe they were just nice (I’m prob wrong).

We contemplated going to a Party in Whistler for a party on Saturday night but decided to stay in town cause we were a little messy. Had drinks and dinner (some kewler than cool place that played really good and really loud electroshock music and had lots of scensters, pretty people, etc...Jason you would have been proud of me eatin' at a fancy restaurant where they didn't provide me with a tray to take the food to my table). After dinner we went to a Bar on Granville (Brandy’s 91 or something like that) and then to Honey in Gastown where my friend heather suggested we walk two blocks down to see West Hastings as night…to which I replied “no, I’m good”. I actually think she was serious. Finally we went to some place around the corner called Wild Rice which was pretty and had tasty drinks. It almost seemed like a bar in LA it was so bright.

Sunday just did some shopping, walked along the beach then to Granville Island then back home to head for the airport.
FYI a pink 007 Thunderbird doesn’t fit three people comfortably. I had to squeeze behind the seats in the back…not so fun.

Good news. TVs on the flight home but crazy lady beside me. Taking a queue from Michael Jackson, I'm sure; she wore a surgical mask over her face for the flight home. She did have a Prada bag and some nice shoes but the mask was unforgivable. (she must be from Vancouver)