Watch Out.

Another wedding last night. Yawn. Hungover. But the bridal party gets to go to a cottage for the weekend! Yay! Too bad it's winter.

Found this yesterday. How have I never heard this song before?

Who'd Ya Do?

ONE HIT WONDERS. You all liked the songs but did you like the singer?

HADDAWAY


Everyone knows this song and most likely thinks of a Saturday Night Live skit whenever they hear it

VANILLA ICE


He did Madonna and even got naked for her book. He's very very very bitter now.

FALCO


Great song. I once heard it mixed with AC/DC and it was even better. I remember my brother bought me the cassette for my birthday.

PAUL LEKAKIS


I still love this song to this day. Paul is a gay, yes, a gay. And I think he posed in Playgirl back in the day.

Who'd Ya Do? HADDAWAY VANILLA ICE FALCO PAUL LEKAKIS View Results Make your own poll

Karaoke!

Auntie and I went out to show off our madd singin' skillz last night. Thankfully, I brought my video camera. Auntie brought the house down with this little number...



I must say, Auntie, your hair is so fetch.

UGLY BETTY

I don't know about you but I can't wait to watch this tonight. Talk in Hollywood say the character Betty is actually played by Pablo in drag.

PABLO STRIKES AGAIN

Auntie Hearts Clay!

Auntie was so excited about Clay Aiken's new album, he headed out to buy it and meet him in person!

Passing Judgement

Scandy - Thirteen Ways to Masturbate
I just got this new CD. It is really, really, really good. If you like agressive eletro dance buy this CD.

Miss Thistle make note:
Mr. Thistle would be a fan for sure.
Here's a little write up on it.

I may have missed the fun at Candy's Birthday but I did get this picture of Thistle dancin' fo dollas!

MMMMMM SUBWAY

Not only did I get a tasty ham sandwich at lunch. But I saw a hottie cashier at the Subway down the street. We're gonna get married one day!

Want!

I'm not gonna front - I am SO buying this.

I Hate Rain

So, how was your weekend?

I got to get nice and loaded on Friday. First off was a going-away party for a former co-worker. Lots of rye and it was really nice to see some old faces.

Then it was off to Candy's surprise party. Now I missed the actual "surprise" element, but was thankfully there for the "bar" element, so it was still funsies. There was some poor kid in ballet shoes dancing outside the bar while I was out smoking a tasty, tasty ciggie. He'd supposedly moved from L.A. to Toronto to "make it" as a "dancer." Best of luck to ya, buddy, but you might wanna try auditioning in front of someone who's not just some drunk bitch trying to reach her blackout stage of the night.

On Saturday Tool ruled, natch. But here's a review if anyone's interested. For those who stopped reading awhile ago, I'll give you a pic of Maynard at his Travis Bickle-y best;

Shitty Weekend

I was sick all weekend. I missed Candy's surprise party, I missed the baseball banquet (were we got awarded second place). I stayed in all weekend left my apt once. I'm still sick but feeling better. Change of seasons always makes me sick!

On a brighter note someone just sent me this. It's pretty funny.

Happy Birthday, Candy!

Is It Five O'Clock Yet?

I'm so ready for the weekend.

Boozing tonight and a Tool concert tomorrow! I'm hoping to be on my first martini by 5:30 or so...

I figured no one wants a Tool youtube, but I figured at least Madamerouge would like this one; Maynard with Tori Amos at her RAINN concert a few years back. Wheeeee!

Who'd Ya Do?

The season premier was on last night, so I thought this week's WYD would look at the hunky docs of Grey's Anatomy

Patrick Dempsey


Chris O'Donnell


Justin Chambers


Isaiah Washington

Patrick Dempsey Chris O'Donnell Justin Chambers Isaiah Washington View Results Make your own poll

I Feel Yucky

I woke up this morning feeling a little ill. Now I'm really sick but I have a meeting today that I can't miss. Maybe I can get it pushed up and go home early.
BTW America's Next Top Model sucked last night.

Incase You Were Wondering...

Incase you were wondering just how gay my condo is look what I found in the elevator and on the concierge desk this morning. Yes, that's right an America's Next Top Model party in the media room with prizes. It says something about bring your own bitchy comments on the bottom of the poster. It could be fun but could also be a room full of nightmare people. And I don't actually want to meet any neighbors (well most of 'em). Then they come and visit. They ask you to take care of their Plants, dogs, cats, etc.

But I will be watching the 2 hr season opener of America's Next Top Model tonight! Let the makeovers and back stabbing begin! Yaaay!

Pablo Captured!

Take note, Canadians. The notorious Pablo has been spotted.

This photo was snapped before he snuck off into the night, presumably for some birthday cake and/or further killing of Canadians.

The Tooth Is Fugged.

I think I've said it before, but the Heather and Jessica at Go Fug Yourself are some funny, funny bitches.

Click here for their take on The Tooth's latest trip to the soccer field with his robot wife.

Blow Me Down.

'Sup bitches. It's International Talk Like A Pirate Day today. Y'all excited?

In honour of this holy day, here's the Sarsgaard pirate sketch from SNL. I'll take any excuse to watch a Samberg clip.

STRUCTUBE SUCKS

Structube is a shitty company with shitty service and shitty products. If you are thinking of buying something at Structube? Don't! Sometime you buy a couch for $2,700.00 and it rips when it shouldn't. Should my elbow really rip a leather couch? You call and tell them about it and they will tell you to call an upholster. Really? You fight with them telling them it's their responsibility and they say they'll look into it if you provide a receipt. If you don't have a copy then they won't do shit. They may advise you they don't keep any records of purchases. Well I think that's bull shit. It's not like you can steal a couch and chaise. If you ask for a number to customer service they will not give it to you. They will advise you they don't have one. You may ask for the company president/owner/ceo but they will not provide that either. Then you might want to try to look on the web for that info but you won't find it because they sell shitty stuff and don't back it up with anything

DON'T BUY ANYTHING AT STRUCTUBE. IT'S A NIGHTMARE COMPANY THAT COULD CARE LESS ABOUT THEIR PRODUCTS, SERVICE, OR THEIR CUSTOMERS.

Mon, Oct 2, 2006 08:00 PM

Ladytron at the The Guvernment
Mon, Oct 2, 2006 08:00 PM


Who wants to go? Anyone?

I hate myself.

Based solely on this picture? I would totally do Federline.

Who'd Ya Do?

Sean Connery
Lots of chicks still think he's hot. I think he's old.


George Lazenby
Don't think I saw this guy in any of 'em.


Roger Moore
I always liked Roger Moore in my mind he IS 007.


Pierce Brosnan
I was never a big fan of 007 until the last two that Pierce did. They kicked ass.


Daniel Craig
Don't know why everyone was freaking out about Daniel being the new 007. Looks like he'll do just fine.
BTW I expect this picture to absolutely destroy Jason

Who'd Ya Do? Sean Connery George Lazenby Roger Moore Pierce Brosnan Daniel Craig View Results Make your own poll

Mad!

Until y'all mentioned it in the comments, I'd forgotten how goddamn funny Debra Wilson's Whitney impression was on MadTV. Spot on.


Changed my mind - had to add this one for Pink's dance alone...

Yaaay Toronto!

Once again another Torontonian wins ROCKSTAR!

Pretty and Smart?

I don’t even know enough to know that I don’t know.

Don't Call It A Comeback...

Finally.

So I'm sure you've heard that Whitney's dumping Bobby's sorry ass. Hopefully now she'll get back under Clive's wing and get a new album out there and return to the sparkly diva Whitney I love.


Although, their divorce really did take me by surprise. I'm sure it was the drugs that lead to the split and all, but what ever happened to real black love??

Jeans Too Tight?

I've Got Personality

It says I'm a little neurotic. I think they mean to say I'm erotic.

All of you that know me can now enjoy yourself as you laugh at the highlights:
I feel enraged when things do not go my way.
I feel resentful and bitter if I think I am being cheated.
I tend to prefer short-term pleasures and rewards over long-term consequences. (I could so have a dart right now)
People generally perceive me as distant and reserved, and I do not usually reach out to others.
I lead a leisurely and relaxed life.
I love bright lights and hustle and bustle.
I am likely to take risks and seek thrills.
I tend not to express my emotions openly and I am sometimes not even aware of my own feelings.
I regard intellectual exercises as a waste of my time.
I naturally assume that most people are fair, honest, and have good intentions.
I find helping other people genuinely rewarding (form of self-fulfillment rather than self-sacrifice).
I sometimes tend to be seen as arrogant by other people. (I though that was because I looked kind of mean)
I am not affected strongly by human suffering, priding myself on making objective judgments based on reason. (i.e. No, I don't have any SPARE change).
I am more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy.
I am reasonably reliable, organized, and self-controlled.
I will think about alternatives and consequences but make up my mind fairly quickly.
One day Pablo will hunt me down and kill me while screaming something about Gringos and Poncho Via.

Does it surprise you that I rated zero under Emotionality? (I don't suspect that's a surprise to anyone I know)

You should take the test. It's results are pretty good.

Lesson from this test.
I'm not as nice as I thought I was (yes I did think I was nice...well kind of nice anyway).
I’m really a cold uncaring bastard but pleasant unless I don’t get what I want.
I’m lucky I can make people smile and have a large member or I’d have no friends.

Bubbles & Conky

Really busy at work today. So I leave you with Bubbles' alter ego Conky

$6,500!!!

I had my orthodontist appointment today. Just to get the top done is $6,500.00 both top and bottom is $8,500.00. It only cost me $75.00 to find that out then another $295.00 to get my impressions done. Now I have to get x-rays for even more $. I don't really need the bottom done so it'll be $6,500.00 after I pay for all this extra stuff. Work only gives me $1,200.00. I don't know where I'll come up with the $5,300.00 Anyone wanna help pay?

on a side note... Oh Brad you silly goose

2nd Place (it's better than third)

Baseball play offs were this weekend. Salem didn't play because he hates me. Jason showed up for the game Sunday morning fresh from a bender with no sleep. I'm pretty sure he was still drunk. But at the end of the day the Sailors (my team) placed second! Yaaaay!

Went out Saturday at 6:00pm and started drinking. Got really drunk (Surprise) and went home at around 1:00am. While I was out drinking Salem was trying to get in contact with me. He had an invive to some film fest party for Brad Pitt and wanted me to go with him. I didn't have my phone with me so he didn't get a hold of me and I didn't go. I see Brad more than enough anyway. Remember he sleeps on my couch when he's in town.

The baseball season is officially over. We just have our team party next weekend and then our banquet the weekend after that.

Oh and for Tim and company. I smoked all weekend long. ;)

Just a note to the Asian guy in the elevator at my buliding this morning. Labour day was last weekend put away the white Guess jeans already!

Monday, Monday.

Six weddings down, one more to go! I'm hurting.

The wedding I went to on Saturday was, uh, boozy. Although I wasn't quite "that girl," I did fall off my chair at one point in the evening. At least I wasn't the only one obscenely drunk; there was a whole table of us! I have various nasty black and blue marks all over myself. Jesus, how old am I again?

Sunday I missed the second day of Virgin Fest 'cause I'm lame and spent the day alternately napping and eating in front of the TV. Although Massive Attack dropped out, I would have liked to have been there to stalk and fawn over Richard Branson. He's my new hero for this story from last week.

Hotel heiress Paris Hilton was left nursing a bruised ego last night after falling victim to an elaborate practical joke set up by Richard Branson at his son's spectacular 21st birthday party.
Paris had asked if she could come to the Mad Hatter-themed bash dressed as Alice in Wonderland - guaranteeing her a starring role.

But when the Virgin tycoon found out, he secretly ordered that all 60 waitresses at the event should also wear Alice costumes - and he rubbed salt into Paris's wounds when she arrived by deliberately mistaking her for one of the serving staff and asking her to serve him a drink.

Awesome.

Hope everyone had a good weekend!

Why I Love Kimora.

I love her. I really do. I want to go for lunch at the Ivy with her after a day of shopping, sip something bubbly, and give bitchy looks at anyone who dares look at us.

Reason #1 - She has the best book cover EVER.


Reason #2 - Her bitchface will stop you cold. Seriously. She will cut you.


The downside? Her Baby Phat clothing line is, uh, not so good. Just a little too twee for me.

COULD HE BE DUMBER?

OMG Could Boogie be any dumber? He so won't win against Erica and he could have won against Janelle. A lot of people still think Janelle screwed them over but only Danielle knows that Erica screwed her over (Danielle was also screwed over by Boogie so I mean wouldn't she choose the lesser of two evils?
HOWIE - Boogie never had that vote.
JAMES - Never would have voted for Janelle but will prolly vote for Erica
DANIELLE - No doubt would have voted for Boogie over Janelle. She will Prolly vote Erica now since they both screwed her over.
WILL - Always gonna vote Boogie.
MARCELLAS - He hated Janelle. Boogie would have got that vote for sure. I think he'll prolly vote for Erica.
GEORGE - I think he would have had Janelle's back. He may be leaning toward Erica over Boogie.
JANELLE - God knows.
ERICA - I think in the end she would have voted for Boogie over Janelle.

Who'd Ya Do?

Pundit week! Try not to let your political leanings bias you on the scales of doabilty, ya hear?

Jon Stewart


Fucker Tucker Carlson


Bill Maher


Bill O'Reilly

Jon Stewart Tucker Carlson Bill Maher Bill O'Reilly View Results Make your own poll

Brad Pit in a TIFF

TIFF has officially started. I know because when I walked by Roy Thompson Hall on the way home last night the red carpet was out and there was a line of people waiting to buy $35.00 last min movie tickets for the show. Yeah $35.00 for a movie! That’s a nightmare. Taste of Toronto also started yesterday. I think I’ll go for lunch there today. Now what should I have?

I went to one movie at TIFF years ago. The movie was The Apostle and when Farrah sat down a couple of rows behind my friend and I we made the Charlie's Angles gun / Karate pose. He, he! The movie was good but it was also free. Farrah started hitting on me after the movie but I was dating Cloris Leachman at the time and working on the Spring Jaclyn Smith Collection (Jacs hates Farrah) so what else could I do but shun her advances. Were were good friends for a couple of years until that whole David Letterman thing. Now I try to avoid her at all costs... I guess she could be worse. I mean she's not Paula Abdul right?

The STAR Schmooze party is tonight across the street from Thistle’s apartment. She can stalk right from her own balcony while smoking and drinking Rye and Ginger but it may be just a bit to high up to get a good look at anything. The bad news... Brad Pitt is gonna be sleepin’ on my couch again for his trip here. I'm just glad Jennifer didn't ask too (now that would be uncomfortable). I don’t know why he doesn’t stay at the Four Seasons like everyone else. We can still “hang out” without him being so chipper in the morning while making breakfast. I’m just being bitchy and he’s a much better house guest than Farrah Fawcett so I shouldn't complain.

They should be busy at the Sassafras, Bistro 990, Rosewater Supper Club, and The Brass Rail for the next 10 days. Here's a helpful guide if you would like to go hunting.

Which movie stars do you think will come see my playoffs this weekend (besides Brad)?

Love The Smell Of Schadenfreude In The Mornin'

Paris Hilton gets busted for DUI. Good times, good times. She's got a good publicist, though; Hilton had "one" drink at a "charity" event? Well played, sir.

The bigger question is whether her lapdog, gossip blogger Perez Hilton, will actually report this today. Rumours abound that he's on her payroll to play nice, so we'll see. He's been kissing her ass something fierce and taking shots at her competition, so he'll chicken out, I'm sure.

TIFF starts today!! Get your stalking shoes on!!

I know You Don't Care But...

Ding Dong the witch is dead! The Evil Dr. is out. Good! I hated him first time he was on the show and hated him even more this time around. The best result of Will's eviction by far is the how pissed Boogie is. Look at his face in the picture below. He's so surprised and later on in the show he moves on to just being plain pissy. I love it, looks good on him. Erica pulled this off without a hitch. And Janelle's speech "I made a lot of mistakes in this game but now I'm finished making mistakes" was fan-fackin-tastic!

Suri.

Yeah, yeah, we finally see the spawn of The Tooth. Cute kid. Whatevs.

However, "Yes, Suri, She's Our Baby"? For real?? Someone should be fired for that shit.



Completely unrelated, of course - how 'bout you watch this hilarious skit from SNL;

Baby Toupees.

I Don't Think You're Ready 4 This Jelly

'Cause my body's too Dundalishous for ya baby! She's back at Yonge & Dundas again. This time without Jay Z.

YUL

Montreal was fun. I was surprised how much French I remembered. I even taught my friend Graham some naughty French.

Jason, Salem and I left on Thursday and started drinking on the train. By the end of the 4 hour trip Salem was boxed and his high pitched squeals were waking up the guy sitting next to him. We got into to Montreal at around 9:00pm and took our showers, met up with some teammates and went out for drinking and dancing. I was pretty shit faced by the time we got to parking (Jason had already got scared and went home) and was surprised to see that ½ the bar was full of girls. Everyone went home soon after but in my time honored tradition of drinking too much and acting like a monster I wasn’t ready to go home. I made lots of new friends by saying things like “What in this town doesn’t suck?” and “What’s with all the chicks in here?” I went to Unity after parking which sucked but I did get me a free drink. Then to Sky which was empty. We woke up the next day and did some shopping but I didn’t buy much just two belts and a shirt.

The rest of the weekend went like this…
Drinks in the room at the hotel.
Drinks at a strip bar
Drinks at a dance bar
Crawling home at 3:30 all messy drunk.
Drinks in the hallway at the hotel.
Sleeping.
8:00 am ball game.

Repeat on Saturday
Repeat on Sunday- but replace playing ball with going home.


Highlights of the trip…
Telling some huge French guy that everything would be much better if he just spoke more of the ‘hinglish.
A certain teammate crawling across the stage at a strip bar while the stripper was crawling toward him…
Kevin’s cage dancing and his duo show with Eric.
Salem asking me if the jacket I was trying on came in “men’s sizes”.
Holly sleeping in the stairwell this year instead of on the toilet.
Me telling everyone I’m a big fat hairy bear.
My teammates all yelling “grrrrr” every time I went up to bat.
The Johnny Walkers.
½ the team not going to bed on Satty night…they opted for a hallway party until 7am.
$3.00 Nasty
Poutine at La Belle Province
Snogging a guy named Marc.
Lisa stealing a cowboy hat from some guy at Sky. Then found it was full of drugs.
Asking the retired dentist on our tem if the bar cashed his social security cheque.
David puking due the stench (I’m sure Mme. Rouge would call it a natural scent) at the Stud Bar.
Mme. Simone
Huge downpore/freezing weather and being expected to play in that.
Sunday night sweat box at Le Parking.
The "Spit and Shove" at the Black Eagle